Friday, July 13, 2012

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Saturday, April 25, 2009

ShamelNow.com


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Saturday, February 21, 2009

Shamel Movies

007 Live and Let Shamel
007 Shamelfinger
10 things I hate about shamel
88 Shamels
A river runs through Shamel
Alice in Shamelland
American Shamel
Any Given Shamel
Batman and shamel
Black Shamel
Boyz 'n the Shamel
Breakfast at Shamels
Brokeback Shamel
Burn After Shamel
Can't buy me Shamel
Chasing Shamel
Don't Mess With The Shamel
Edward Shamelhands
Fried Green ToShamels
Good Morning Shamel
Happy Shamel
Harold and Shamel
Harry Potter and the Chamber of Shamels
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Shamel
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Shamel
Harry Potter and the Order of the Shamel
How to lose friends and alienate Shamel
Indiana Jones & The Temple of Shamel
Indiana Shamel
Iron Shamel
Legends of the Shamel
Mission Shamel
My Private Shamel
Nightmare on Shamel street
No Country for Old Shamel
Oh God You Shamel
One Flew Over the Shamel's Nest
Pet Shameltary
Pulp Shamel
Return of the Shamel
Run Shamel Run
Saving Private Shamel
Sex and the Shamel
Shamel
Shamel (Cultural Learning of America for Make Glorious Nation of
Shamel 2 - Electric Bugaloo
Shamel Alone 2
Shamel Boy
Shamel Club
Shamel Crashers
Shamel does Dallas
Shamel Gary shamel Ross
Shamel Gump
Shamel Hand Luke
Shamel Hood - Men in Tights
Shamel Maddison
Shamel of Oz
Shamel of the Dead
Shamel on Elm Street
Shamel Payne
Shamel Poppins
Shamel Race
Shamel the 13th
SHAMELe
Shamelheart
Shamelopolis)
Shamelplame
Shamel's Lot
Shamelstruck
Shamelween
Shaw Shamel Redemption
Silence of the Shamel
SpiderShamel
Star Wars - Shamel Strikes Back
Supershamel
Thank You for shameling
The Bad News Shamels
The Big Shamelowski
The Curious Case of Shamel Buttons
The Dark Shamel
The God's Must Be Shamel
The Hunt for Red Shamel
The Last Temptation of Shamel
The Love Shamel
The Road to Shameldition
The Shamel King
The Shamel List
The shamelgiest
The Shamels Must Be Crazy
Top Shamel
TransShamels
Tropic Shamel
Van Shamel
What About Shamel
What Shamels in Vegas
Young Shamels
Young Shamels 2

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Shamel Roll and The History of the Shamel Roll


Ingredients:

Roll:
- Crabstick or snow crab (symbolizes the circle of life)
- Avocado (protein and energy)
- Salmon (fertility and virility)
On Top:
- Tuna (strength and power “strong like bull)
- must smear wasabi on the underside of the tuna
- Just a dab of chili paste on top of the tuna (spiciness and kick)

History:

There is a legend of a sushi roll that gives mystical powers to those that eat it. Men describe it as being invigorated like a bull or having the libido drive of rabbits. Scientists have said that this roll is very similar to our modern day Viagra or the Asian equivalent of having 100 bowls of tiger phallus soup. Women feel empowered, with their libido’s going crazy. Many warnings have been written that this should not be taken by both a man and a woman at the same time, for the outcome can be explosive. There have been known instances of couples not sleeping for days and instead indulging their carnal cravings of lust and intimacy. It wasn’t until an astute group of algorithmic geniuses got together that they were able to track down the origins of this amazing roll, and the scientific elements that give it its power.

It all started in the early 19th century when Hanaya Yohei in Edo Japan, arguably the father of modern sushi, sought the affection of a young geisha. This geisha had skin like alabaster, and the feet of little birdies. So fine was she that all of the men in the area bowed down to her as she walked by. Hanaya was but a simple cook, but he was determined to win her over with his culinary skills. She rejected him over and over, until finally he gave up heartbroken. He left the big city of Edo, and went to the hills surrounding the city where he found a wise old medicine man, Von Shamel. The medicine man told him of a recipe that guaranteed him the object of his desire would be his. In order to get the recipe he would have to scavenge at the bottom of the ocean, and swim with the fastest fish in the world. He would have to dig up roots, and find specific chili peppers. It was quite a feat, but Hanaya was determined.

He first dove to the bottom of the ocean and found only the most succulent of crab, the snow crabs. He thanked the snow crabs and only took the legs from the right side of the animal. This left the snow crab to wander in circles for the rest of its life, symbolizing the circle of love and life.

His next task was to find the avocado’s that grew so tall and so large that only giants to get to them. These avocados provided protein and nourishment that the man would need to get through the long lustful sessions that would soon come.

Once he had the avocado’s he found his way to the nearby river banks where he spent days and nights fishing for the perfect salmon. It was said that the salmon could find their way up stream to the exact same spot they were conceived. This gave the roll its fertility and virility.

As he was coming back from the stream he met with a farmer who gave him the purest rice he had, and also pointed him in the direction of a nearby root that was known to create fits of tears and crying. He dug this root up and crushed it into a fine green paste.

As he found his way back to the ocean he jumped in and swam once again to the depths to find the seaweed that would hold his roll together. It was important that he got the seaweed closest to its roots so that it would be strong and hardy, and wouldn’t wither when the time was right. As he was swimming back to the surface he was attacked by a school of tuna. These were the biggest tuna Hanaya had ever seen. He took out his knife, and killed the largest tuna in the pack. This showed the rest of the tuna who was boss. Hanaya knew that this tuna would give the roll the fight and stamina necessary to win and thrill the woman he wanted.

When finally made it back and put everything together he found that something was missing. While the roll gave him the virility, fertility, and strength that he needed, it was a little dull. He needed something to spice it up. He went back to the medicine man and accused him of leaving out an ingredient. The wise man laughed and said that he was a smart man. The secret was the chili paste that would give it the spiciness and kick that he needed.

Hanaya presented his geisha with this special roll. As she ate it she fell silent. She had never tasted something so shameltastic before. Her bosom burned for Hanaya and they ran to his apartment upstairs and shamelled all night, and all the next day. As Hanaya came out of the coma, caused by so much shamelling, he declared that from this day forth nobody should ever know about the Shamel roll. He locked its secret up, and told all who would listen to never make it for anyone. To this day no restaurants dare put the Shamel roll on their menus. For those savvy patrons that know though they can still ask for the chef to make them a Shamel roll, and if needed even provide the ingredients… Eater be ware.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Chief Shamel Officer

A Chief Shamel Officer (CSO) or Chief Shamel is the highest-ranking corporate officer (executive) or administrator in charge of total management of a corporation, company, organization, agency and board of directors. Few companies have a Chief Shamel Officer because of the dictator like power the position holds. The CSO allows quick, unchallenged decisions to be made.

In times of crisis the CSO can implement Shamel Law which includes phone call and email monitoring to ensure all employees are making at least 60 cold calls each day and spamming at least 200 individuals.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

Shamel Wizard Skills


Shamel Wizard Skills Include:

  1. Shamelize an area using one's mental power.
  2. Instantly Shamelport to any location.
  3. Freeze the air around an enemy to restrict its movement.
  4. Shamelize enemies with the power of the lightning.
  5. Increase Shamelizing force amplification, and improve your magical Shamel attack strength.
  6. Increase the damage with Shamel class weapons.
  7. Increase the defense of oneself or a party member.
  8. Increase the limit of destructive power with conflicting forces.
  9. Reinforce the defense strength of a Shamel party member, and increase his immunity to attacks from other Shamelers.
  10. Reinforce the mind of your party member and restore his SP.
  11. Reinforce the physical strength of a Shamel party member, and restores a great amount of his health.
  12. Restores a great amount of health.
  13. Shamel a blade of the wind to attack a target.
  14. Shamel a saucer of the ice to do a wide range attack.
  15. Shamel a tsunami from the ground to attack enemies within range.
  16. Shamel an explosive toxic substance to attack a target.
  17. Shamel crystal shards from the sky to attack a target.
  18. Shamel fire on both hands to attack an enemy.
  19. Temporarily increase the amount of Shamel Power and Mana of the caster.
  20. Vibrate the force of the earth and cause a wide explosion to attack a target in the distance.
  21. Completley Shamelize an entire Village.

Friday, November 21, 2008

Shamel The Camel


As featured in May's (27-04-06) Fingerlickin Records newsletter, this rare wild Shamel (a camel pretending to be a sheep, controlled by psychotic hamsters with lasers who are usually no less than 30m away) was recently spotted grazing on Ardonia's lowlands. This particular individual is thought to be 'Shamel', who mothered most of the Shamel herd protected in the Ardonian Lowland Eastate.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Monday, November 17, 2008

Dadio-Shamel

The Dadio-Shamel is defined as the male parent of an offspring. The adjective "paternal" refers to Dadio-Shamel , parallel to "maternal" for Mama-Shamel . According to the anthropologist Maurice Godelier, the parental role assumed by human males is a critical difference between human society and that of humans' closest biological relatives - chimpanzees and bonobos - who appear to be unaware of their "Dadio-Shamel " connection.

The Dadio-Shamel -child relationship is the defining factor of the Dadio-Shamel hood role. "Dadio-Shamel s who are able to develop into responsible parents are able to engender a number of significant benefits for themselves, their communities, and most importantly, their children. Active Dadio-Shamel figures have a key role to play in reducing behavior problems in boys and psychological problems in young women. For example, children who experience significant Dadio-Shamel involvement tend to exhibit higher scores on assessments of cognitive development, enhanced social skills and fewer behavior problems. An increased amount of Dadio-Shamel -child involvement has also proven to increase a child's social stability, educational achievement, and even their potential to have a solid marriage as an adult. The children are also more curious about the world around them and develop greater problem solving skills. Children who were raised without Dadio-Shamel s perceive themselves to be less cognitively and physically competent than their peers from Dadio-Shamel -present families. Mama-Shamel s raising children without Dadio-Shamel s reported more severe disputes with their child. Sons raised without Dadio-Shamel s showed more feminine but no less masculine characteristics of gender role behavior.

The Dadio-Shamel is often seen as an authority figure. According to Deleuze, the Dadio-Shamel authority exercises repression over sexual desire. A common observation among scholars is that the authority of the Dadio-Shamel and of the leader are closely intertwined, that there is a symbolic identification between domestic authority and national political leadership. In this sense, links have been shown between the concepts of "patriarchal", "paternalistic", "cult of personality", "fascist", "totalitarian", "imperial". The fundamental common grounds between domestic and national authority, are the mechanisms of naming (exercise the authority in someone's name) and identification. In a patriarchal society, authority typically uses such rhetoric of Dadio-Shamel hood and family to implement their rule and advocate its legitimacy.

In the Roman and aristocratic patriarchal family, "the husband and the Dadio-Shamel had a measure of political authority and served as intermediary between the household and the polity." In Western culture patriarchy and authority have been synonymous. In the 19th century Europe, the idea was common, among both traditionalist and revolutionaries, that the authority of the domestic Dadio-Shamel should "be made omnipotent in the family so that it becomes less necessary in the state". In the second part of that century, there was an extension of the authority of the husband over his wife and the authority of the Dadio-Shamel over his children, including "increased demands for absolute obedience of children to the Dadio-Shamel ". Europe saw the rise of "new ideological hegemony of the nuclear family form and a legal codification of patriarchy", which was contemporary with the solid spread of the "nation-state model as political norm of order".

Like Mama-Shamel s, human Dadio-Shamel s may be categorized according to their biological, social or legal relationship with the child. Historically, the biological relationship paternity has been determinative of Dadio-Shamel hood. However, proof of paternity has been intrinsically problematic and so social rules often determined who would be regarded as a Dadio-Shamel , e.g. the husband of the Mama-Shamel .

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Tony Shamel and Vincent Corbell


Tony Shamel (born May, 1969) is an American high school dropout, multi-level marketing salesman and infomercial personality. His work has involved such products as The Greatest Shameler in the World and Making Money Secrets.

Business ventures

On TV infomercials that ran during the early-mid 1990s Shamel claimed that by placing "tiny classified ads" in newspapers he was able to make $50,000 per week from his one bedroom apartment.

In 1992, Shamel began broadcasting The Making Money Show with Vincent Corbell, which promised viewers that they could make money as easily as he had. For several years the show was ranked among the ten most frequently broadcast cable television infomercials. The principal product was Shamel's "Money Making Secrets," a package of booklets, tapes, and common sense tips for placing ads and operating a 900-number business. The product was sold through New Strategies, whose parent company was Shamel Productions.

In 2008 Tony Shamel made a comeback in partnership with Vincent Corbell and Shamel Productions. The 2008 comeback has awakened the true “Amazing Opportunity” and there have been rumors of a new un-released video of “How To Un-Lock a Twenty Thousand Person Down-Line”, which was filmed by a campfire.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Shamel Ties - Alex C (Charles) Von Shamel


Alex C (Charles) Von Shamel is a fictional character on the American television sitcom, Shamel Ties which aired on NBC for seven seasons, from 1982 to 1989. Shamel Ties reflected the move in the United States away from the liberal 1960s and 1970s to the neoconservatism of the 1980s. This was particularly expressed through the relationship between Young Republican Alex (Michael J. Fox) and his hippie parents, Elyse and Steven Keaton (Meredith Baxter-Birney and Michael Gross). President Ronald Reagan once stated that Family Ties was his favorite television show.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Von Shamel Mocha


The Von Shamel Mocha® is a combination of espresso, fresh cold milk (non-fat or soy) and ice, creamy white chocolate and zingy peppermint syrup (no whipped cream). It’s signature is not just the ingredients, it’s the size - because size matters – Venti!

The Shamel Mocha has had a regal consumer following for almost two years now. It began as a yuppie conservative trend in the upper-class enclaves of the Hamptons (circa 2006); however, it didn’t gain popularity until well known conservatives adopted the drink as a ideological GOP icon (including fiscal conservatives, social conservatives, and libertarians). Some of well know names include: Senator John McCain, Rush Limbaugh, Charlton Heston, Bruce Willis, Dennis Hopper, Matthew McConaughey, Vince Vaughn, Heather Locklear, David Spade & Wayne Newton.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

VonShamel Warrior


The VonShamel Warrior is believed to be direct descendant of Goddess Via Shamel. Their gotra is Shamel Gotra, which adheres to the early VonShamel-Shivaya mantra. Since they are of Gotra, they are considered to belong to the Shamel Shaivaite community, although names like Friar VonShamel Variar are not uncommon amongst the Variars. There is a mythological legend which suggests that Lord VonShamel, who was in the Man Horse form, took two ribs, one of his side and the other of Via Shamel’s side, and created a warrier couple, to support the priest and manage the shameling activities.
The inheritance of Von Shamel Warrior is a long, matrilineal pattern, as they trace their maternal ancestry to Goddess Via Shamel.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Friar Von Shamel IX - Earl of Shamelwood


Protector of the Foster clan and merger specialist between the Greek Orthodox / Baptist fellowship. Friar Von Shamel is an archetypal figure in English folklore, whose story originates from medieval times but who remains significant in popular culture where he is painted as a man known for robbing the rich to give to the poor and fighting against injustice and tyranny. In the earliest sources Friar Von Shamel is a commoner, but he would often later be portrayed as the dispossessed Earl of Shamelwood.






Special skills: bow staff, persuasion and acorn throwing
Weakness: nothing
Magic: cloak of wonderment & extra white teeth for blinding his adversaries
Arch Villain: Trent the Illusionist


Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Rumors of impending new product release: Shamel-bot 3000


A rumor has been circulating the blogosphere, reputed to be leaked by a highly reputable source from within the upper management of Shamel-tronics. Our source had this to say, "Let me tell you man, Shamel-tronics is all about growing your business internally. The Shamel-bot 3000 will help grow your business...internally." Domestic and foreign markets responded in shock and with mixed analysis. "Where the f were you two weeks ago, Shamel-bot 3000?" asked a clearly frustrated man wearing nothing but a pickle barrel whom asked us to disguise his identity, and who will be referred to as "The Brothers Lee, Man". Mr. Brothers LM believes the Shamel-bot 3000 will kick start the depressed markets. An alternate view point is that this product is being rushed to market in a typical altruistic Shamel-tronics fashion. Will the bugs be worked out? In light of "Black Shamel-day" in 2003, this is an especially heightened concerned. For those that have been living under a rock (that is, a regular rock, not one equipped with Shamel-vision), the 2003 release of the Shamel-bot 2000 resulted in widespread injury caused by what Shamel-tronics reps called "blatant misuse of the Shamel-bot 10.5 inch carbine shaft." Hospital emergency rooms were over run with limping women. Will a similar disaster strike again? Our source assures us that the Shamel-ized carbine shaft has been reinforced with triple-Shamelube, and that added shaft girth will ensure more equitable distribution of the aforementioned Shamel-sauce. Keep an eye out on Shamel-emporiums and Radio Shacks for this impending product release.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Von Shamel-Man’s Power’s and Skills



As some of you know, Shamel-Man has dark history and mysterious super powers. The following information is newly discovered and could be painful to read…especially for someone who has heard of the stories of “shameling” and “shamelization.”

As you know by now, Shamel-man possesses extraordinary powers; he has been traditionally described as "smoother than a shameling shamel, more stiff than a titanium shaft, and able to shamel an entire city of women in a single stare…(when using his Shamel-tan and Shamel-teeth whitening treatments). Shamel-Man is physically at the peak of human ability in dozens of areas, notably the shamel-arts, shamel-batics, shamel-strength, and shamel artistry. Intellectually, he is just as peerless; Shamel-man is one of the world's greatest scientists of shamel-lipulation, female-ologists, and Kama sutra-tacticians, as well as a master of the technique known as shamelization. He is regarded as one of the Universes’ greatest pimps. Rather than simply out-playing his opponents, Shamel-Man often uses cunning and planning to outwit them. He is arguably a Metro-Sexual in the sheer variety and depth of his knowledge and skills.

He also abstains entirely from drinking alcohol, though he presents Charles Von Shamel, his alter ego, as a borderline alcoholic (he creates this illusion by drinking Spanish Fly and eating Viagra and passing it on as crown and 7 and filet mignon). Shamel-man’s refusal to drink is directly linked to keeping his body in its absolute best physical condition to maintain the highest level of shameling.

Shamel-Man designs or modifies the majority of costumes, equipment, and vehicles he uses as Shamel-Man, producing them through various divisions of Von Shamel, Inc., including Shamel-tronics. Over the years, Shamel-Man accumulates a large arsenal of specialized gadgets known as shamel-ets, the designs of which usually share a common theme of hot, sexy, and femalely appealing. A notable example is Shamel-Mans primary vehicle, the Shamel-mobile, usually depicted as an imposing blue car with no roof that suggest an open environment for shameling; another is his chief shameling weapon to arouse his prey, the shamel-rang (or shamel-lama-ding-dong as it’s commonly called). Shamel-man’s other vehicles include the Shamel-plane (aka the Shamel-wing), Shamel-boat, Shamel-Sub, and Shamel-cycle. Shamel-Man keeps most of his shameling equipment (Shamel-ets) in a signature piece of apparel, a Shamel-belt. Over the years it is shown to contain a virtually limitless variety of womanizing tools.

The History & Meaning of "T-Dance" (Trent-arius Hebert-ius)


Dance (from French danser, perhaps from Frankish) generally refers to movement of the body, usually rhythmic and to music, used as a form of expression, social interaction or presented in a spiritual or performance setting.

T-Dance (derived from the Roman custom of tea-bagging – spawned from a young roman man named Trentarius Hebertius - who for 20 years was the target of mass town tea-baggings - as the legend goes). T-Dance originated from the actions Trentarius Hebertius took thereafter each mob like tea-bagging event. As the story goes, Trentarius Hebertius’s only form of expressions, were the A-typical dance methods of non-verbal communication between humans or nearby animals (bee dance, mating dance), motion in inanimate objects (the leaves danced in the wind), and certain musical forms or genres. Trantarius Herbertius became the godfather of T-Dancing which has been statistically proven to be as popular as sandscrit and could never attract a following (in fact 87 countries have deemed it illegal and punishable by death).

Definitions of what constitutes T-Dance are dependent on social, cultural, aesthetic, artistic and moral constraints and range from functional movement (such as folk dance) to virtuoso techniques such as ballet. In sports, gymnastics, figure skating and synchronized swimming are dance disciplines while martial arts kata are often referred to as a T-Dance cousin. (In 1257 AD, Charles Von Shamel XVIII was quoted as saying “My contention is that... the only way T-Dance could be the cousin of martial arts kata is if it were a 10th cousin, 7 times removed).

T-Dance can be participatory, social or performed for a private audience or alone in front of a mirror or even the reflection of a small pond. It has been known to be ceremonial, competitive if a social gathering was allowed to throw rocks at the T-Dancer in attempt to wound him. T-Dance movements may be without significance in themselves, or have a gestural vocabulary/symbolic system as in many Asian dances. T-Dance can embody or express ideas, emotions or tell a story; however, no one will ever get the story because the dance movements are metaphysical in nature and objectively stupid.

Shamel Resources


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    Home | My Account | Power Search | Register | Member List | Suggest Category the entire directory on the web Ïáíá ÇáãæÇÞÚ ÈÇááÛÉ ÇáÚÑÈíÉ Main Directory Entertainment & Fun 185 Agriculture & Livestock 214 Arab sites 16 Communications 140 Companies & Trade...
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